#just playing with character design while i figure out how to code...........

[fluttershyes]

would you visit them

[buckets-and-trees]

I think game designer Bucky and game tester Reader should not only test the games, but also the new gaming chair Bucky's got... 😏

Eva, my dear, you dropped this idea my way 13 months ago, and it took a while for my muse to finally figure out how to serve this up, but I'm finally here to deliver.

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Characters/Pairings: Game Designer!Bucky x Female!Reader Word Count: 2.4k Summary: Situationship. Yes. There was something happening between you and Bucky. His acquisition of a new gaming chair seemed like the perfect reason to invite you over to his place for the first time... PART OF A SERIES BUT THEORETICALLY COULD BE READ AS A STAND-ALONE

Content/Concept Warnings: gamer AU; explicit smut (vaginal fingering, oral - female receiving, a little biting, orgasm denial); beefy Bucky who is kinda cocky, kinda soft, but a definitely a menace

Notes: The WEEK TWO offering for @buckybarnesevents Hot Bucky Summer 2025! Serving up the "Did I give you permission?" dialogue prompt and orgasm denial.

previous part: Test Play | Series List

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You showed up to Bucky Barnes’ place for the very first time with a pack of energy drinks and a bag of sour gummy strawberries, both ridiculously nervous and yet somewhat calm. He opened the door in an impossibly tight t-shirt and sweats that are slung low on his hips. He stared at the gummies for a moment with a kind of offended reverence, then at you, and wordlessly stepped aside to let you in.

It was nearing the end of summer, but the inside of his apartment was cold enough to keep produce fresh. You wound your hoodie tighter around your waist, a reflexive urge to retain heat and maybe, if you were being honest, set up an opportunity for him to put his hands on you later. 

“I got the chair set up in the living room,” Bucky said, gesturing vaguely, though his face radiated a kind of single-minded pride. 

The new chair was the excuse to invite you over in this new thing developing between you two. 

You looked around to see the gaming setup: two monitors, a stack of unopened peripherals, a rug with a hexagonal pattern that looks both overpriced and necessary, and the new chair glowering in the middle of it all. You whistle, low and sincere.

“Did you assemble it yourself?” you asked, dropping your bag by the arm of the couch.

Bucky nodded. “Instructions were ass. Had to use a torque wrench and also, for some reason, a knitting needle.”

“I can’t believe you ordered this,” you said, standing in the middle of his exceedingly tidy living room and gazing at the monstrous, throne-like rig now squatting in the corner by the window. “Isn’t this just for, like, competitive streamers?”

He shrugged, a little sheepish despite the way his arms bulged against the sleeves of his t-shirt. “I had a coupon code.”

You snorted. “A coupon code? I know how much these cost.”

He didn’t answer, only grinned.

You looked back at the chair. “Honestly, this is a throne, Barnes. Am I supposed to kneel, or do you want me to sit on your lap?”

He barked a laugh, but his face also flushed a bright red, which made you squirm and bight back a giggle. “Right to the quick and dirty with you then, huh?” he huffed. 

You sidled up to the rig and ran a hand over the buttery armrest. "It's just… intimidating. A little intimidating, is all." But the look you gave him was anything but cowed: challenge, flirt, and a wink. “But you know I like a bit of that.”

He stepped closer, and you could feel the tension between you, coiled and humming. A summer ago you’d have fizzed and fizzled away, but he’d made it clear he was interested in you. With the new context, the heat between you was alive and kinetic. You turned the chair a quarter turn and dropped into it with a small bounce, swinging your legs up and crossing them, spinning slowly to face him as he prowled closer with your offerings.

He took an energy drink from the pack, cracked the tab, and took a slow, deliberate pull, eyes never leaving yours. When he handed it to you, his thumb lingered on your fingers a half-second longer than absolutely necessary, and you both noticed. 

Heat. That, and the chill, was all you could feel—like your body was ice and your blood was infused with caffeine, and you weren’t sure you cared which sensation would win the day. You took the drink from him and matched his stare, then took a deep, throaty gulp, neat as a dare. He watched your throat bob, and you watched his eyes darken in the process.

"Want to do a test run?" he said, voice a little hoarse.

You gestured at the rig, then at your own dumb self. "Am I being beta tested or testing your set up?"

"You're the only one I want touching the hardware," he said. He moved behind the chair to tweak the lumbar support, and his hands bracketed you for a moment, near enough that you could smell the clean musk of his deodorant and something sharp, synthetic, like ozone. You tried not to shiver.

You hovered the mouse in digital menus for a while, glancing up at him as he fiddled with the monitor tilt to angle it to your height. 

When his hand brushed your shoulder, you bit the inside of your cheek, stubborn about maintaining composure. He was so very close. It was almost cartoonish, how much he dwarfed the chair—how much space he seemed to take up, even as he hovered behind you. 

You toggled the settings up and down, but your focus was split—one half on the clicks, the other half on the lazy, weighted way his fingers traced the edge of the desk before finally, gently, pressing a gummy into your palm. You snorted a laugh, accepted the offering, and chewed it slowly, the sour sugar kindling microexplosions on your tongue. 

“You always this pushy?” you asked, through the bits of candy. 

He spun the chair a half-turn, and you swung with it; suddenly you were between his knees, his hands still on the chair, knuckles whitening, body close enough you could see how uneven his breathing had gotten. He was on the edge of something, but you couldn’t tell if it was restraint or anticipation or just the general frazzle of having you here, in his space.

“I’m not pushy,” he said, voice dropping a register. “I just know what I want.”  

“Which is?”  

“You,” he said, and it landed, heavy and real, like a gauntlet thrown onto the desk.  

You watched the line of his jaw, the quiver in his throat, the way his knee bounced faintly as he tried not to betray himself further. It was easy to be arch, easy to be glib, but this feeling—this weird, hovering intimacy—made you want to be honest, or at least a little less armored.  

“I want you, too,” you said.  

He exhaled. Some fractional tension left his body, but the rest of him stayed coiled, ready, a held breath of a man. 

"Show me," you said, soft but certain, and Bucky moved like something in him had snapped. He dropped to his knees, the chair pinched between his spread thighs, and his big hands slid up your calves, thumbs pressing in circles through the fabric of your leggings. He looked at you with an intensity that bordered on worship and then he hooked his fingers under the waistband of your leggings and peeled them down to your ankles. 

The chill of the apartment hit you, but then so did the searing heat of his breath through the cotton of your underwear, and then the wet, rough press of his tongue as he mouthed you over the thin fabric. You squirmed, powerless not to, as he mouthed you again, harder this time, and then with a quick, almost ruthless rip, he had your underwear balled in his fist and your cunt bare, already dripping for him. He groaned, low and husky, the vibration shivering through your pelvis as he licked a stripe from the base of you all the way up, then circled your clit with the flat of his tongue until you gasped. 

You tipped your head back and let the ceiling blur in your vision, the whole apartment a fog around the too-real focus of his mouth on you. The chair creaked under your grip as he sucked your clit between his lips, slow and thorough, each movement measured to draw out as much sound from you as possible. He buried his face deeper, nosed along your folds, tongue fucking into you with a sweetness matched only by the wanton sloppiness of it—like eating you was an assignment, a pleasure, a calling. 

"Bucky," you choked out, and your hands found his hair, the soft pull just making him moan. He tipped his face up, mouth gleaming, eyes black with want, and leaned in again, licking you open before plunging his tongue deep into you and groaning like a man starved. The vibrato of it dragged a startled yelp from your throat that dissolved into shivering laughter, pleasure ricocheting up and down your spine. 

You bucked your hips against him, not out of strategy, but because something in you wanted him impossible-close. He was ready for it—one of his hands shifted up, palm flattening against your belly, holding you exactly where he wanted you. He licked you again, long and thorough, then flicked his tongue over your clit until your thighs shook and your eyes blurred. 

You let out a noise you’ve never made, high and ragged, and you barely registered when he pressed two fingers inside. He curled them up, pressed them right against where you needed, and pumped in lazy, devastating rhythm and you thought you might actually come apart on this very expensive chair, melt into the synthetic mesh and memory foam and leave a mark that would never quite come out.

You tried to be mindful of the world beyond the two of you, but the rest of the apartment faded into static, overwritten by the wet drag of his tongue and the rhythmic pressure of his fingers as he worked you closer and closer to the edge.

"Fuck—Bucky, I'm—" you managed, andhe stopped. Abrupt, like a door slamming behind you in a dark hallway. He pulled back, hands braced on your knees, eyes hot and unsparing as he caught your wild, desperate stare. You were right there, flailing in the slipstream, and the sudden absence of him was so sharp, so mean, you made a wordless, strangled noise. 

He licked his lips. “Did I give you permission?” he said, which was a new configuration of Bucky Barnes, and a terrifyingly effective one at that. 

You panted, air thick in your throat, and managed a shaky, “That’s not fair.” 

He smirked—wolfish and soft all at once. “Never said it would be.” 

You gaped, mind sputtering, a strangled whine caught in your chest. He arched an eyebrow, his grip tightening just barely, just enough to be felt as a promise.

“I—” you started, but there was no good answer in you, not with the way he was still kneeling at your feet, thighs splayed, cock straining beneath the thin cotton of his sweats, tongue glistening with evidence of your complete undoing. 

You gripped the arms of the throne, knuckles white and trembling, and glared at him. “You’re a goddamn bastard,” you managed, but it sounded more like a plea than an accusation, and he grinned as if you’d handed him the highest compliment.

“Say it again,” he murmured, rising just enough to flatten his palms against your thighs and push them wider, stretching you open under his gaze. “Say it like you mean it.” 

“You. Are. A. Bastard.” The words came out in staccato, punctuated by the slow push of his fingers, finding your pulse point inside and curling up. You moaned, the sound guttural. He moved with impossible control, his face soft with worship even as his hands worked precision chaos between your legs, returning you to the edge and holding you there.

You flattened a palm to his scalp, not because you needed leverage but because you needed to anchor yourself, stake some symbolic claim on this moment so you didn’t simply burst into flames and cinders. The heat between your thighs was a different kind of fire, stoked with each lazy, wicked pass of his tongue, the way he sighed into you, the way he watched your every twitch and quiver like it all belonged to him. 

You said it again, softer this time, nearly a gasp. “Bastard.” 

He smiled against you, the curve of his mouth obscene and perfect, then he pressed inward and set a brutal, indulgent rhythm with his tongue and fingers both. He wanted you to break, and you wanted to let him. The chair rocked under you with your gathering tremors, and he pressed your hips down, not letting you back away from the rush of sensation. You whimpered, then pleaded, but Bucky kept you right there, eyes fixed on your face as you. 

“Please.” You heard yourself say it. Nothing else. No elaboration, just the honest edges of the word. 

Bucky slowed, then stopped, withdrawing his fingers with deliberate, excruciating slowness. The ache in your cunt was so intense it bordered on grief. You reached for him blindly, but he caught your wrist, holding it in the air between you, his thumb pressed just enough to be present at your pulse. 

"You don't get to finish yet," he said, voice low and purposefully cruel. "You hate when a game is too easy. You’ve said so yourself." 

Your breath stuttered, a high, keening sound escaping your chest. You blinked at him, not sure if you wanted to cry or hit him or both. “But… this isn’t a game though.”

“No,” he affirmed, his tone more serious, recognizing you checking in with him in the moment. “It’s absolutely not a game.”

Your heart warmed and relaxed, and you both smiled at each other. 

But then a moment later Bucky was back in it. He rose up, looming over you with the intensity of a thunderhead, and a thrill ran through you. He hooked his thumb under your jaw, tilting your face up to his. “Open your mouth,” he said. 

You did, breathless, trusting. He leaned in and pressed two gummy strawberries to your tongue, sour sugar dusting your lips, and then he followed with his own mouth, tongue licking up the flavor before it could dissolve. You tasted yourself, the candy, his breath—clean and a little wild. When he bit your lip, gentle but hungry, you made a noise you didn’t recognize as your own. 

“Barnes,” you hissed, gummy half-melted and sticking to your cheek. “Are you trying to kill me?” 

He drew back just enough to see your smile. “Not kill. Ruin. There’s a difference.” 

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[stagefoureddiediaz]

We’ve been looking at this all wrong the entire time...

So my brain is a weird place that I don’t fully understand, but sometimes it connects dots and I figure something out that has been staring us in the face the entire time! Lets just say it explains so many things - right down to the very pointed use of tommy calling Buck Evan!

This all stemmed from me looking at colour theory and costuming for Buck and Eddie (and by extension Tommy) season 7 again, because I was going to try write the buddie costume metas for episodes 9 and 10 that I never managed to get done before we started season 8 I will hopefully get to those posts, but this post - while technically about Tommy and his costumes (yes me ant Tommy person writing a post on him I know!) it does also look at the costuming for Buck and to a lesser extent Eddie more widely across the season and what the colours used actually mean - getting some distance and some time on the season has been a blessing!

Im not going to go into it in detail, but, broadly speaking the show has given each character a signature colour - this doesn’t mean they wear it all of the time - but they do wear it a lot of the time and especially in key scenes - characters can have more than one key/ signature colour, and it can change and develop over time. We can ignore season 1 because it was a pilot season and very often shows won’t choose to establish a signature colour for a character (911 s1 is all over the place from a costuming perspective - because they had several designers working across the 10 episodes but since s2 we’ve had much more continuity with Alayna Bell-Price at the helm for most of it). So for example Athena’s signature colour is mostly black with white and khaki green also in the mix. She’s moved away from that subsequently - wearing less black and more white/creams but both colours are still staples of her wardrobe.

Eddie we all know mirrors Athena from a costuming perspective - his signature colours are also black and khaki green with some white/cream as well. The khaki green was much more dominant than the black to begin with - which played into his military past -  that had evened out on the black and khaki front whilst the cream had stayed fairly steady, but now we’re also starting to see a little bit more of it as well as some darker blues. this mirrors Athenas own journey t healing - the more she heals the less Khaki we see and the more white/cream - Eddie is starting to follow the same path from a costume perspective. 

Bucks signature colour has always been blue, but he also wears a fair amount of yellow and grey, so those are his three colours. He obviously wears a lot of other colours, especially white, but white has its own specific use in Bucks costumes that sits separately from his signature colours. 

We all know about yellow/ blue and green blue colour theory - I’ve gone on about it enough (especially yellow blue colour theory and its queer coding) and others such as @lover-of-mine have as well. Well both yellow/blue and green/blue continued to play out in season 7, I’m not going to go into them in too much detail - there are posts on my pinned post that cover that much better and I want to get to the good stuff (and I know you all do too!) 

We do need to remember that Buck and Eddie very very rarely wear blue and green in scenes together - if Eddie is in green Buck won’t be in blue, and vice versa - this is because of the ties to blue/green being Buck and Eddies break up colours - the colours they wear opposite their respective girlfriends when the relationships are ending. This is a little less set for Eddie - who actually wears white/cream much more when he’s ending relationships than blue or green - but the one time he has actively done the breaking up he was in green.

As I was starting to do a bit of work on the 7x9 and 7x10 metas, I ended up going back and looking over the Buck and Eddie costumes for the season as a whole, and how Tommy fit into all of that as well - as we’ve all been billing him as Eddie lite.

While I do still think there is an element of Tommy being Eddie lite, I don’t actually think that is what the show has been doing -that concept is a bit of a red herring. I’m sorry that this is likely to get a bit convoluted and wordy - but my brain is  still reeling and incoherent so bear with me - I hope it all makes sense.

Right this post is super long so the rest is going below the cut! I hope you enjoy!

Because I was looking for Eddie and Tommy parallels in the costuming for the season, I had been looking at the choice to put Eddie in red/black for his dinner date with Kim and Buck being in green for the scene at Bucks loft, and the fact that back in 7x04 Tommy had been dressed in the same colours - a red henley which was shot with black giving it a red/black colour way. I naturally started looking at the other Eddie - Tommy costume parallels - and there are plenty - lots of the khaki green we see Eddie in - playing into Tommys own military background.

These are Tommy’s scenes - where he wasn’t in uniform of some description (which is a good chunk of his scenes to be fair) 

7x04 

at the hangar - white tee, greenish stone coloured shirt and a tan jacket with stonewash jeans

at the court - light grey marl cut off hoodie and bright blue shorts

at Bucks loft - red/black short sleeve henley and stone wash jeans

7x05

at the restaurant -dark khaki green shirt (I would also like to point out the blue green colour theory here with the addition of tommy having a blue phone case - which is relevant later I promise!)

coffee meet up - light grey henley and navy blue hoodie with mid wash jeans

7x06

karaoke club - navy blue short sleeved henley

7x10

light grey marl tee and greenish denim shirt 

So what you can see from this is that besides the use of henley’s, the only time we get actually get direct reference to Eddies costuming is through the use of khaki green and his first outfit at the hangar. There is of course the direct parallel of the red/black colour way I spoke of before, but, beyond that if you look you’ll see that Tommys outfits actually parallel Bucks far far more. I would even argue the Henley’s are more similar to Buck than Eddie - because they are short sleeved and Eddies are invariably long sleeved.

Bucks colours are blue and grey - and so are Tommy’s - particularly in scenes that are 1-1 with Buck. What I’m trying to get at and will explain is that this has never ever been about Tommy being Eddie lite - this is all about Tommy being Buck - Buck’s subconscious if you will. (I know you all this I’m completely mad at this point - but stick with me!) I have a lot to say about all of this which will explain the why of it all and how we ended up here so we’re going to go through it Tommy costume by Tommy costume!

Lets start with the hangar scene - the most Eddie like Tommy looks throughout the entire season. this is very much intentional - this is about the red herring of it all, but it is also about Eddie (I’m not discrediting anything we’ve talked about regarding Tommy being Eddie lite etc - it is all relevant - but that’s what makes it such a good red herring!) and about Buck being an unreliable narrator. This is in part why we also still see Buck in his too short trousers and his white sneakers. This is his journey (the sneakers), but he’s still trapped in his old self at this moment in time - but aware that he doesn’t fit his skin anymore (as an aside I will be writing a post about Bucks trousers and their changing fit throughout the seasons at some point soon!)

Script wise the key lines are plentiful - the entire scene is full of double meaning. We get Buck stating that he is ‘happy where he’s at’ and Tommy’s response of ‘you’re thinking of changing things up’. viewed through the idea that Tommy is a version of Buck, this then plays out as an internal conflict - a battle about wanting what you already have - being happy with what you have, but also wanting to change things.

Eddie saying ‘you aren’t thinking of leaving us are you’ and Bucks response ‘I’m keeping my options fluid.’ Eddie needing reassurance that what they have isn’t going to change, while Bucks reply is about him not really being sure of himself - of who he is - keeping his options open because he’s figuring out if he wants to change - the line is said to and directed at Eddie so its about Buck keeping his options open about possibly changing their dynamic - becoming something more, even in the face of Eddie not wanting things to be different.  Tommy stating in this scene that Buck doesn’t need to leave the 118 to get certified to fly - that its something he could do for fun on his days off - becomes even more loaded through the internal monologue lens - Buck considering how he can stay at the 118 and have the joy, fun and benefits of ‘flying’ when he isn’t at work - that he could fly with Eddie (Eddie going flying with Tommy to do something fun and date like is a very literal visual metaphor for Bucks internal monologue - showing him what it could be like if he changed things up). There not being three tickets - only two is also important - its again a metaphor this time about how if Buck and Eddies relationship changes - it would only change for the two of them - it would become a relationship that doesn’t have room for another in it. When I say that’s about Chris not being involved it sounds really harsh, but the reality is Chris cannot be a a part of Buddie - he cannot be a part of something romantic. it isn’t saying Chris isn’t important or central to Buck and Eddie - simply that he cannot be a factor in a romantic relationship - that has to be just between Buck and Eddie alone - its kind of about Eddie (and also to a certain extent the same is true for Buck) not being able to hide behind Chris anymore when it comes to Buck.

Fundamentally its all tied back to his death in season 6 (we even get the being struck by lightening reference from Buck just to bring that aspect home) and subsequent resurrection and rebirth  (post linked on my pinned post if anyone wants to read it!). we have to keep at the front of our minds that Buck has died and that is still playing on his mind - its still influencing who he is and who he is becoming and it was all throughout season 7 - even if it wasn’t obvious or stated.

The basketball costume is actually the one that has always stood out for me - Its the most Buck outfit of all Tommys outfits. The bright blue shorts especially. 

So in that scene, which we know is supposed to read as being from Bucks view point, not only are we getting golden haloed super happy bouncy Eddie - Eddie the way Buck sees him -  but Buck is also projecting and seeing Tommy in the place he (Buck) has always existed in. It’s a visual representation of what Buck talked about with Maddie and Tommy replacing him in Eddies life.  Its unreliable narrator buck in visuals he’s seeing Eddie replacing him with Tommy - occupying the same places Buck has and more - from the calendar to the basketball court.

But that’s actually wonderful, because not only does it give us information on how Buck views himself (as expendable/replaceable) and how he thinks others view him - because if he thinks he’s similar to Tommy (which for a purely visual stand point he is - Lou looks more like Oliver than Ryan) but it also gives us information about the reality of how much Buck is actually intwined in Eddies (and Christophers) life - its telling us that Buck is in fact on Eddies calendar (and therefore fridge - fridge magnet theory for the win!) and how much space and conversation he occupies in the Diaz’s everyday life.

So he isn’t actually seeing Eddie in Tommy at all - he’s actually seeing the version of himself he doesn’t think he is but wants to be in Tommy. The version of himself that takes Eddie to vegas etc - that’s the Buck that Buck wants to be - the one openly flirting with Eddie and taking him on dates etc. That’s why the vegas fight is so seemingly ott (especially when you think about the fact Tommy and Eddie have known each other a week or so at most by this point) its the grand gesture Buck wishes he could be making.

All of this also makes Bucks ‘attack on Eddie’ more telling (it’s still the boy pulling the girl he likes pig tails in the playground concept) because Eddie is being receptive to all of these advances by Tommy - adding further weight to the Buck being jealous of and threatened by Tommy. 

Tommy is this version of Buck swooping in and doing all this stuff that Buck wants to be doing (subconsciously still at this point - willful ignorance be winning) but either didn’t know how to or didn’t know Eddie if would be receptive to. Remembering that this is all Bucks viewpoint of things its essentially Bucks brain showing him what dating Eddie would be like and Buck being Buck misunderstands what his brain is telling him (forever misunderstanding the assignment).

There is a second aspect to this and it ties into Tim’s comments about the hamster wheel Buck has a been stuck on and it being time he got off it - the hamster wheel is actually multifaceted and has more than one meaning. The most important is that the hamster wheel hasn’t ever been about his relationships or about the women he’s dating (or men now). The hamster wheel he’s stuck on is actually the fact that he’s built this strong relationship and family with Eddie and Chris - (you don’t find it son you make it) and its something safe and stable and predictable in his life. Getting off that hamster wheel is about being brave and moving that relationship - that family dynamic onto the next level - removing the platonic aspect of their family and making it a fully formed family for real - romantic love and all - so the ‘platonic’ family is the hamster wheel he actually needs to get off of. 

The other aspect of Tommy actually being Buck and the hamster wheel of it all is that hamster wheels are solitary pursuits - the implication is that Buck is the one standing in his own way - and coming back to the basketball game we see that played out in the moment where Buck tries to literally run through Tommy - only you can’t act out at yourself, and Tommy is a literal solid unmoving barrier and Buck won’t get past himself by just trying to bulldoze his way through.

This all then plays into the final Buck and Tommy scene of the episode - in bucks loft. I already spoke above about the red/black of it all, but now with the added concept of Tommy being A version of Buck things start to become more interesting. The red/black of it all is a warning (and the poker date red/black velvet suit and eddies red and black suit from s6 actually play into this as well!) - its dark romance - ‘forbidden’ dangerous romance or love. So for Eddie and his date with Kim that meaning is very self explanatory. The two season 6 suits are also fairly self explanatory - for Eddie again its the dangers of looking for romance that isn’t on your own terms and for Buck at the poker game its about the danger of falling in love with the person you are when you aren’t being truly yourself. Tommy being a version of Buck and this concept is a little more murky - essentially is about a similar thing to his poker suit - with a twist - its about the danger of seeing more value and loving a version of yourself that ‘used to exist’ as well as a version of yourself that you think will make you more attractive to others.

We do also need to Talk about Bucks costume here as well - the fact that it fits him almost perfectly - he’s in well fitted if slightly loose jeans and a navy shirt that isn’t tight with buttons not clinging on for dear life (to the same extent). The colouring is still on the dark side - so its not entirely positive - much in the same way that other scenes with buck in a dark navy shirt are moments where things go a bit askew for Buck (think the  taylor ‘I kinda love you for it’ scene from s5 as an example). The implication is that - before Tommy comes along Buck is at his most content with who he is - he’s fitting into his skin better than he has in a long while but it’s not perfect. This is key, firstly because of how the scene unfolds and secondly, because of how he is then costumed from here on out for the rest of the season.

I do also want to mention the yellow blue colour coding in this scene and that is mostly done through the lighting - Buck is in blue and the light behind him is always yellow - he is surrounded by yellow light. In contrast - Tommy is barely touched by the yellow light - not until Buck starts to figure things out - then we get him briefly touched by the yellow light - the rest of the time he is lit very cooly - which is in contrast to the warmth of the loft - and further plays into the idea of Tommy being a stand in for Evan - Evan who isn't loved and accepted in the same way Buck is - Evan who Buck needs to learn to love.

If we look at the script for this scene, it also fits in perfectly with the idea of Bucks internal monologue.  Tommy and Eddie being ‘buddie’s’ making perfect sense is a literal aside to the audience telling them that Buddie makes perfect sense - but it is more than that. This is where I have to bring up the ‘Evan’ of it all. I know a lot of us shudder with horror because of the fact Tommy only ever calls Buck ‘Evan’ and how both jarring and rude it is. How it shows how little Tommy knows Buck. We’ve always known it was being done intentionally. Well, if we view the use of Evan through the lens of Tommy being a version of Buck and things become clearer.  Because Tommy is basically the old version of Buck - the Buck who existed before he knew Eddie - before he joined the 118. And this is where the choice to bring back Tommy specifically for this role becomes a really smart one - because ‘Evan call me Buck Buckley’ was Tommys replacement at the 118. Tommy who has a problematic past that has never been dealt with on screen. This isn’t about the nature of the problematic past. This is the show playing on the idea of Buck’s software upgrades - before Buck 1.0 there was Evan, and using who Buck replaced at the 118 as a plot device to actually dig into Evan more so that Buck can deal with, accept and move on from Evan and become who Buck is meant to be.

Tommy saying he couldn’t replace Buck furthers this - because Buck cannot go back to being Evan - Evan can never replace Buck. invoking Christopher adds weight to this - because Chris never knew Evan - he’s only ever known Buck and Buck is ‘his Buck’ and irreplaceable. Tommy then stating his jealousy is about Evan feeling the lack of family that he grew up with - the recognition that as Buck he has made a family for himself - Bucks assertion that Tommy (Evan) was a part of it is valid - because without Evan Buck couldn’t build the family he has. The entirety of this conversation is about Buck choosing to ‘get to know’ his past (remember this is coming of the back of Buck crossing out the ‘LEY’ on his nameplate in s6 and his struggles with his parents acceptance in that season before the lightening strike), choosing to learn about Evan and embrace him as a part of Buck.  

Bucks assertion that he was ‘trying to get [Tommys] attention and it being exhausting’ is part of that as is the confusion Tommy expresses. The choice for Buck to use the word ‘exhausting’ - it’s Bucks subconscious trying to get his own attention - its his subconscious telling Buck that he’s exhausting himself by not listening to what his inner voice is saying. It’s of course a play on Buck being called exhausting by other people (and is perhaps why he doesn’t have the confidence to listen to that inner voice) and that also plays into the Evan of it all and how Buck views himself. Tommys confusion also plays into that - bucks own mind is confused - it was getting ready to ‘pursue’ Eddie but now we’re pivoting into what is essentially self love.

The continued bringing up of Eddie also makes sense with the contact of Tommy being alt Buck - because Eddie Eddie Eddie fills Bucks heart and mind - Both Evan and Buck recognise Eddies importance if not his full relevance in this moment. The resulting kiss then becomes less about Bucks bi awakening (I am not diminishing the importance of that in any way shape or form - its a vital aspect of Bucks journey) and more about Bucks decision to pursue loving himself - this ties into his statement ‘it wasn’t about me wanting to leave the 118 - it was about wanting to get to know you’ - its about Buck wanting to get to know himself - on the other side of his death and resurrection. It’s a continuation of his comments about Natalia ‘seeing him perhaps better than he sees himself’ - it’s about Buck starting to see himself better now he’s died and essentially been reborn and bout Buck now being in a place where he feels ready to confront that idea of being reborn and becoming someone new.

At the restaurant in 7x05 we have Tommy in an Eddie colour, but in a shirt that is much more Bucks style. There is also the green/blue colour play with Tommy stating Buck isn’t ready and Tommys ‘mismatched’ clothing bears that up - the play is on Bucks lingering confusion and uncertainty about what he wants - is it the Eddie side of things we’re pursuing the self love of Evan aspect we’re looking to explore? The entire scene is not just about Bucks first ‘date with a dude’ its also about Bucks fumbled attempts at self love - at not getting it right - its why Bucks outfit doesn’t fit him- why they’re now too big and baggy (I wrote about this in my costume meta for that episode - which like all the other costume posts can be found linked on my pinned post).  The innuendo about closets and Buck going into masculine bro mode is as much about his nervousness about being on a date with Tommy and being seen as it is about the fact that a man practicing self love is still taboo and so often met with derision - hiding that you are pursuing that is a kin to hiding queerness - at the start - until you get to a good place with it.

We side step into the Buck and Eddie loft scene briefly to look at Bucks confession to Eddie - I could write a whole thing on Eddies acceptance of Buck and its importance - but that is for a different post that isn’t already a million words long! what I want to mention in this scene is the why Buck can’t stop thinking about Tommy of it all - how it is essentially establishing the idea that Buck is starting to listen to himself.  He can’t stop thinking about Tommy because it isn’t Tommy he can’t stop thinking about it’s actually himself - Evan - in a learning to love himself and embrace who he is and was kind of way - all being done through a bi lens. it is essentially about Buck doing the thing he needs to do to be ready for a forever relationship with Eddie - which is love and accept himself - all of himself and acknowledging that to Eddie.

Buck switches back to better fitting clothes for the coffee date - and tommy is now dressed back in Buck colours and no trace of anything resembling Eddie in sight - making it clear that Buck has chosen to pursue himself. To get himself to the place he needs and wants to be first - the line about not knowing what it is he’s ready for but being ready for something is key - its a very self love line, but it also puts a very clear time frame on things - it makes it clear that Tommy is not endgame - because Bucks choosing self love and embracing and understanding ‘Evan’ isn’t his end game but a part of his bigger journey - a part of becoming who he needs to be to achieve what he actually wants - to get him to his endgame.

Then we have the Karaoke - brief scene(s). There isn’t really a huge amount in these scenes. But I do want to point out two things - the awkwardness of Buck and Tommys hug - and how that plays into the tentative nature of Bucks self love journey - and also Eddies behaviour towards Tommy - and the way it was very very clearly a lot cooler than we saw in 7x04.

We all jumped on the Petty Eddie train - and I agree there is an element of that. But - there is also the fact we are not seeing that scene through Bucks eyes - its through external eyes and we are therefore seeing the actual reality of Eddie and Tommys friendship - in that it isn’t this heightened date like - flirty new love type relationship - its simply two people who are loosely friends. Its remarkably normal and no threatening - only furthering the entire purpose of 7x04 being from Bucks viewpoint and Tommy being an alt Buck rather than an alt Eddie. It also therefore serves to further establish the Buddie of it all (but we all already knew that!). Tommy is still in Buck colours and the short sleeved henley is still something I would put more into the Buck costume camp than the Eddie one - especially in this season! 

The final Tommy scene and costume is the date at Bucks loft and the conversation about daddy kink. I still don’t like this scene (which has a lot more to do with execution and the script than the actual daddy kink of it all) but I am much more sanguine about it now that I understand what it is setting up.

Bear with me here I probably won’t make sense, but with the knowledge that Tommy is actually buck lite - a less good and developed version buck (Evan and in part the version of Buck that Buck himself thinks he is) the daddy kink scene actually becomes about setting up Buck addressing his past and his actual real daddy issues - because bucks past self sees his worth in those issues and without them it means both Evan and Buck have no worth. Buck confronting and dealing with them and choosing to forgive and move on means the end of Buck and Tommy because Tommy is no longer needed - he has served his purpose and Buck would be ready to start his future - Evan stays in the past and Buck completes his rebirth and closes his lightening strike arc.

Onto Bucks season 8 journey - Bringing Gerrard in to Bucks arc rather than the others who have far more connection to Gerrard now begins to make much more sense. Tommys past under Gerrard actually echoes Bucks past - in different ways and to vastly different degrees, but the parallel is there.  S1 Buck being a play boy and sleeping around and not treating women especially well (objectifying them etc) because of his own hang ups - is a pale echo of Tommy being closeted and racist sexist and homophobic under Gerrard. Like I said before - Buck is a pale imitation to Tommy here and that’s intentional (more in a sec) because once Tommy is under the wing of Bobby when he takes over the 118 we see him begin to grow and change. Buck follows the same pattern - Bobbys guidance pulls him away from his destructive behaviours and sets him onto the right path (Bobby is arguably the birther of Buck - Look I could write a whole thing off the back of my death and resurrection of Buck post about Bobbys role as God - the heavenly father - in Bucks life and how that is the overarching theme of Bobby and the show but I don’t have the time tbh!) to ‘redemption’.

Bucks behaviour is very intentionally not as bad as Tommys behaviour, because if Tommy is the plot device meant to essentially represent Bucks subconscious and how he views himself, then the reason we haven’t been shown Tommy atoning for any of his past sins and behaviours is because Buck hasn’t forgiven himself for his own. Buck is his own worst critic and will self flagellate to a ridiculous degree - and again with him being an unreliable narrator - he views his past indiscretions as being the equivalent of Tommys - therefore in his mind he hasn’t yet done enough to deserve absolution (Buck and Bobby being father and son in this as well!). 

Which brings me to s8 and the return of Gerrard and what Bucks arc is going to be (this is slightly incoherent and not fully formed - I’m still percolating!). Gerrard being central to Bucks arc - and Bucks push back is imo going to be about Buck taking a good look at himself and recognising/ facing up to and accepting his past. And that actually does come down to the daddy issues of it all. Because if Bobby is as good as Bucks dad - and allowed him (and his subconscious in the form of Tommy) to develop and grow - then Gerrard is Phillip Buckley (obviously a heightened more terrible version of reality in the same way Tommy is a much worse version of Buck) who parented Evan through apathy and taking the easy route - we saw Evan pushing back against Phillip in Buck Begins and being rewarded for it and thus establishing Bucks self destructive and self sacrificing pattern of behaviour. Acting out and getting hurt got him attention - so Buck acting out against Gerrard is this reduced and will ultimately have the same results just in an essentially more destructive way.  This is is a good thing - because this is about Buck recognising that he is worth and acting out etc is detrimental to him progressing as a person - its going to actively prevent his self love journey to flourish (and this is why in part I maintain my belief that Tommy is going to, if not encourage Bucks behaviour, then at least tell him to go along with Gerrard demands - for an easy life and also part of why I don’t think we’ll see a huge amount of Tommy - at least to begin with - until we get to a point where Buck is really motoring on the self love journey and getting to the point where he needs to do some pre break up face to face conversations that move him forward!).  It’s about forgiving and accepting his father for how Evan was raised - Bucks arc is going to be about forgiving himself and allowing himself to be happy, and he cannot do that if he doesn’t go through the Gerrard stuff - which is essentially a type of therapy. That’s also where I think the golf comes into it - it’s a metaphor for Buck building bridges, gaining understanding and accepting his past with his father - the metaphor of the driving range being the idea of standing side by side and performing the same thing, but landing in different places. There is also the concept of improving ones self and choosing to not repeat the mistakes of the past.

It also means the thing Tim said about Buck and Tommy becoming more comfortable with one another makes much more sense, and why he’d flip the question to talk about Eddie and about Eddie feeling a bit left out in the cold but not out in the cold! Buck is becoming more comfortable with himself and while he’s doing that and learning to be happy etc as I described above. Eddie is going to feel left out - because this is about Buck not Eddie - because it’s about Buck being ready for forever with Eddie - and Eddie ultimately cannot be a part of that journey - Buck has to do it for himself in the same way that Buck cannot help or be there while Eddie goes through his reckoning with the Catholic Church, and faiths place in his life and also dealing with the ghost of Shannon and his mother issues(because he has those and they are all set up to go in s8 - Chris being in Texas really sets that up nicely!

Bahaha Tim I’ve finally figured out your question answering methods and how they tell us all we need to know!! 

All this to say - Tommy is actually alt Buck - not Eddie lite (I mean he is still also that but it’s a bit of a red herring) he is a plot device for the biggest thing about Buck as a character and it all means Buddie here we come!

Thank you so so much if you have read this epic piece of waffle - I hope you enjoyed and I truly look forward to hearing all your thoughts on this and to you being as insane about it as I am!

Tagging some people who asked (and some who didn’t but might be interested anyway!)

@spotsandsocks @exhuastedpigeon @lover-of-mine @fruityfirehose @leothil

@bewitchedbewilderedbisexual @theladyyavilee @livingwherethesidewalkends @craigyxo

@izzysbeans @buddiediaz118 @inell @hotshotsxyz @winterskydragonx

[dontcallthedoctor]

Skittles Goes to the Amazing Digital Circus! Announcement (+ Auditions and Casting Call)

Hiya, fellas! I've got a very special and important announcement to drop out of the blue today. For the past couple months, I've been hard at work starting up pre-production on an Amazing Digital Circus fan film!!!

Skittles Goes to the Amazing Digital Circus! is a passion project I've been slowly developing with some close friends of mine, including @mikiib, @cluelesscleo, @jeggyweggy, @tomatertate, @endomentendo, @apatchydragon, @pizzycrisisline, @sillycringychaoskitty and MANY, MANY more! You all are some of the funniest, sweetest, most talented people I've ever known and I love you all so much. I am so honored and thankful to be able to call you all friends <3

Skittles Goes to the Amazing Digital Circus is, in it's current state, intended to be a feature length animatic. It acts as both a continuation of Digital Circus' story, and as unofficial backdoor pilot to the Skittles universe. I originally envisioned it as being fully animated, but of course if we took that route, we'd end up working on this twice as long as we need to. The compromise is that it'll be made as a (hopefully) colored animatic (just the key frames with limited animation), fully voiced and scored.

(Note: It'd be a good idea to look at my previous post where I discuss the character Skittles in-depth, otherwise some aspects of this story might not make sense!)

Premise:

The story (so far) follows Skittles, a pre-teen axolotl boy who, while browsing Gbay, finds a listing for a blank disc with the words "TADC (NOT FOR DISTRIBUTION) scrawled on it in red, blue, and yellow marker. After checking the description, he realizes that it's a recovered copy of the game The Amazing Digital Circus, described as "an experimental early/mid-ninties game of mysterious origin and design". Skittles likes the sound of it and buys it. After some initial trouble with the installation process, Skittles is sent an email from a mysterious sender who claims to be someone trapped inside the game. They plead with him NOT TO PLAY THE GAME, but to look into it and figure out a way to free them from the outside.

So Skittles does what any of us would do. He plays the game after this obviously-disheveled stranger pleads with him NOT to. Of course, this leads to him being sucked straight through his monitor into The Amazing Digital Circus! Once inside, he meets the circus gang and is given his orientation by Caine.

As the humans get to know Skittles, they begin to notice a few strange things about him. For starters, unlike them, he (apparently) looks the same here as he did before he dropped in. He also remembers his name and retains most of his memories from the outside world. It isn't until the next morning, when Caine awakes without his powers, that things get really odd.

Evidentially, sometime in the night, some fluke in the game's code causes Skittles to be bumped up in the digital hierarchy, giving him all of Caine's powers, effectively making him the ringmaster by default! Caine becomes disheartened, feeling this is some divine punishment for his shortcomings as ringmaster and his constant inability to please his guests. Feeling unwanted and useless, Caine leaves behind his hat and cane and exiles himself from the circus, travelling far off into the Void where he can't cause anybody and harm.

Meanwhile, the bewildered circus gang are left to deal with the newly appointed Ringmaster Skittles, who makes it clear that he has no idea what he's doing. Despite his newfound powers, he's still just a kid and proves to be utterly incompetent at running the circus. Not only is his young brain not mentally ready for the responsibility, but the "ringmaster protocol" gradually starts to take over his mind, making him just as bonkers as Caine was if not worse. With the fate of the circus hanging in the balance, it's up to the circus crew, realizing how much they truly need Caine, to bring him back and restore order... or the Digital Circus may never be the same...

Originally, this started off as more of a "what-if" scenario with no real story behind it, but the more I mulled over it with friends, the more we realized this could actually make for a really cool story. Once it was decided that Skittles should take over the circus and become the ringmaster, the rest of the premise fell into place. Granted, the story isn't completely plotted out yet, but the beats are all there. In the end, Skittles helps the circus gang to further appreciate one another, but most importantly, to appreciate the asset they have in Caine. For his part, Caine learns how to listen better, to relate, and also how he can make life in the circus better for everyone, hopefully without compromising his vision or ideas.

Currently we're looking for artists (concept/storyboardists, line artists, background artists mainly) voice actors (for Ragatha, Jax, Kinger, Caine and Bubble) a couple writers and composers. Production isn't super far along in terms of content, but I'll post a handful of sketches and concepts that everyone's drawn up!

If anyone is interested and would like to take part, feel free to DM me, either here on Tumblr or at my Discord (anunmadebed)! I'm really looking forward to working with ppl and hearing what y'all think Abt this! Words cannot describe how damn EXCITED I am I'm stimming so hard rnnn

(So sorry if that seemed like a mess, I get really nervous talking about things I'm passionate about in public ^^)

[toxinoire]

Out of boredom I'm just gonna make more Mean Girls headcanons because you people seem to really love those.

• Cady is a picky eater. She can eat dishes that are so extreme, but show her mashed potatoes and god forbid scrambled eggs mixed with bell peppers and she will go "No."

• Gretchen owns a lot of glitter pens. She fucking loves glitter pens.

• Janis is into coding. She had to learn it once because a digital website for art she uses crashed so out of spite, she learned coding.

• Regina does know how to sew and make clothes even. She just doesn't do it a lot, so by far the only person who knew was Janis. It wasn't until Christmas where Regina gave handmade everyone jackets and beanies with designs specific to them that they learned.

• Karen knows to play the fucking accordion. The way everyone learned was that they snuck into the school's music room, there was this one dusty accordion and out of boredom, Karen just picked it up and started playing Get Him Back by Olivia Rodrigo on the damn thing.

• Janis and Gretchen are a fucking detective pair. Someone in their group got made of or is sick but hiding it? They're the first ones to figure it out.

• Damian is the parent of the friend group.

• Regina and Cady have a shared thing for Greek Mythology.

• Karen can and will read their emotions and their entire being if they don't wanna admit something with the most angelic smile you've ever seen.

• Cady sleeps early, but you cannot drag her out of bed at any time before seven.

• Janis and Regina used to have a height chart but not for the "I wonder which one will be taller" reasons that most do, they had it because they were so adamant to know which one of them would be cuddle sized. They never talked about it until one day, in Janis's house, Gretchen fucking found it.

• Don't be fooled by Cady's height, she's feral as shit and will kick your ass.

• Karen is scared of frogs.

• Regina is secretly into flower language.

• Damian has RTC cosplays hidden in his closet. Yes, even Karnak.

• Everyone still wonders how Cady did not cry during while watching Titanic.

• Gretchen is into anime, but not the cutesy ones. The gorey ones. It's a coping mechanism don't judge her.

• Speaking of coping mechanisms, so far, Janis's healthiest one is dying her hair tips/streaks a different color when things go to shit.

• Regina will just hide and come back when she's good. Her friends hate that she does that.

• Karen has once the sent the group chat a gif of a walking sign and it left everyone wondering where the fuck did she find that.

• Gretchen is into romances and she always sees multiple tropes in her friends.

• Surprisingly, now that Regina has her head out of her ass, she actually is a fucking treasure trove of ideal character tropes.

• Damian and Cady carry Hello Kitty band aids around all the time.

[theworldsarchitect]

BLOG INFO - READ BEFORE SENDING ASKS🔧

This Blog is based off a Roblox game called Forsaken, specifically the character from said game, Builderman!

-I have no affiliation with the developers of Forsaken.

-This character is based off of the personality in Forsaken, not the real Builderman.

⚠️THIS MOD IS A MINOR.⚠️

RULES

NOTHING NSFW. Suggestive is okay, but nothing outright sexual.

Nothing about Gaza or Palestine. I will not respond to it.

MUST follow DNI rules.

Unless it is an in character response, I will not allow any hate/discourse and you will be blocked.

Don't criticize how I play the character. He has no set in personality. This is based off of MY interpretation.

CHARACTER INFO

Name: Builderman (Builds for short), David

Pronouns: He/Him

Format for text will be:

"This for talking,"

[this for an action,]

and bolded character names.

If I speak without bolded text, it is an out of character response.

CURRENT/PAST EVENTS

The C0rruption Event: Currently happening

- something is wrong with BM and no one knows why this is happening. He's been less happy, fatigued, and is somehow suffering from an illness.. He sounds almost encrypted, as if he's just a piece of code that was corrupted. A file. He's been losing weight slowly, with the problem being a lack of appetite because of his illness. It's up to the other Survivors and the Anons and everyone else to figure out what exactly is going on and stop it before it's too late.

Event tags:

"Event: Corruption"

"An unfamiliar voice."

"A voice that resents you."

DO NOT INTERACT IF:

- Nazis, pedos, maps, com/proships, zoophiles, groomers, abusers/abuse supporters, terfs, toxicity, discourse, NSFW only accs, etc.

HEADCANONS/AU FACTS BELOW CUT

(and tags, credits, etc)

-Builderman is one of the main architects, builders, and creators of Robloxia. He built the world from the neck down.

-He's cisgender, with an unspecified sexuality. It doesn't matter to him.

-while he looks like he's in his thirties, he's a lot older. Yk being the one who built the universe n all makes ya old

-OKAY I GIVE UP.... he's 4'9. I GIVR UPPT RNDKMDNDNS

-He owns Builder brothers pizza, manages Roblox HQ with Studios, designs blueprints and schematics for buildings and creations, and is apart of the main construction crew of Robloxia.

-He often tries to keep himself looking happy for other people to see, even if he isn't.

-He tends to stay optimistic when in bad situations. (In jeopardy currently)

-He will not appreciate you calling him David.

Tags:

Toolkit - interaction (in character)

Blueprints - Headcanons/au facts

Builders Club - mutual response

Schematics - inbox/answered ask

Damned - Forsaken specific

Events will have their own tags regarding what specifically is happening in said event.

Lampett - interaction (out of character)

OTHER @S

@lamperts-rokea - my Regretevator Lampert blog - currently turning it into my main blog

@ask-betrayal-goob - my Dandy's world AU blog

Also check out @yourlocalpizzaguyelliot - He runs an Elliot blog from the same universe Builderman is in!

Will add my main blog @ when it exists lol

Also planning on adding my new Lamprt blog, since my current is dead and is simply a fanart dump

Credit for dividers to @medical-meat for the wrench divider (thank you bbg)

and this cool person for the orange one ^_^

[ichayalovesyou]

Why Do Old-School TV Duos Have SUCH MLM Vibes?!

I think there’s something very specific about the formula and writing style of non-serialized/semi-serialized shows from the 60s to 80s that featured two grown men going on wacky dangerous adventures that makes my gay little literary analysis brain go absolutely off the wall bonkers. I’m trying to figure out why!

I’m writing this on my Trek blog because I don’t think this pattern in people actually shipping these types of relationships the way they do if fandom as we know it wasn’t born via TOS in syndication. That being said! I also think it has to do with the way these shows are designed that makes myself and others OBSESSED with a specific character dynamic that feels (to me) damn near impossible to replicate in modern television. In a way that’s more than just fandom, it’s in the way TV like this was written at the time!

Further explanation under the cut!

����️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

I think what it usually boils down to is this. There’s a charming protagonist whom without the series could not operate, frequently top billed or the title character! (See: Wild Wild West, Starsky & Hutch) BUT he doesn’t have anyone to play off of! So what do they do pretty much every single time? Give Mr. Idealized Vision of Time-Period Masculinity For Genre a second guy to rhyme with!

See but the other guy has to play opposite but parallel to our hypermasculine protagonist. So what frequently ends up happening is that in order to play off our “normal” guy, even though he’s also a white dude, is that he’s still somehow Other.

They’re always perfect for each other, and they always get into scenarios that would be written, shot and interpreted by conventional audiences as romantic IF either one of those characters were a woman! Especially at the time these shows were made in.

If the one is aggressive, the other is gentle. If the protagonist is violent, his counterpart is intellectual. If the one is stoic, the other is emotional. Which (while one size def doesn’t fit all) usually makes the second guy come off as much more queer-coded (and sometimes other minorities like neurodivergent/disabled etc) than the other because of the traits associated with masculinity vs gayness at the time! Our prime examples in these gifs are Spock, Hutch, Artemus, and also *BJ!

*(M*A*S*H is a bit of a unique case since the show flirts with queerness more openly in ways that people more into the series have explained better than me but I think it still fits the formula I’m discussing.)

Here’s the thing though right? We’ve got two best friends, and the show NEVER really feels right if one of them is missing unless the focus of the story is how A & B operate without each other while trying to find the other one. They stick with and rescue each other unfailingly in scenarios that might destroy a regular friendship.

Hell, there’s often stuff that would emotionally/physically destroy a regular person/character in modern media. But because it’s not serialized they always seem to pull through seemingly through the power of friendship alone or dealing with it off-screen! Emotional consequences? Yuck! (Unless it’s M*A*S*H or Starsky & Hutch, like I said, not monolithic)

Here’s the thing that some people might say throws a wrench into the interpretation I’m discussing. What about the absolutely non-stop parade of conventionally attractive women the main protagonist (and less frequently the supporting man) goes through?

I would reply: how many of those female characters actually emotionally impact our protagonists as characters long term?

The answer is of course, because it’s NOT serialized, almost none! Kirk can watch Edith Keeler get killed by a car accident and still be making eyes at Spock the next episode. Hawkeye can have a “life changing” romance with a Vietnamese humanitarian woman, then share a blanket with BJ next episode like she never existed!

The Doylist explanation of course is not just the fact it wasn’t serialized but also just, constant, blatant 20th century sexism. Which SUCKS!!! As well as not wanting a long term love interest to throw off the character dynamic of our duderagonists. It’s the 20th century tv equivalent of bros before hoes.

However the Watsonian explanation always seems to result in no love interest EVER being more important than what the two protagonists have no matter whether you think they’re queer or not. No attractive woman could make our reputed babe-hound protagonist abandon his buddy. There’s no earnest romance our more queer-coded supporting man doesn’t end (or get ended for him) often for the protagonist’s sake.

Now some of these women are incredibly well written and straight up GOOD matches for our guys. So why wouldn’t they get involved in something long term UNLESS!! They were in love with each other the WHOLE time?

What if protagonist (frequently the babe hound) doesnt know he’s queer, or knows but doesn’t know he’s in love with his bestie, or any number of similar fruity explanations? The supporting man also runs into this explanation but people tend to believe he’s already aware that he’s queer but either also doesn’t know he’s in love or is keeping it to himself because time-period homophobia and/or thinking (probably not unreasonably) that babe hound is straight?

Between the inherent closeness of being narrative foils. The regularly scheduled life or death drama creating sometimes insanely romantic (in the narrative if not a literal sense) drama between the two. The revolving door of weekly women they never seem to get attached to enough to leave one another. The non-serialized nature resulting in sparse personal information/history about the protagonists as a result.

I think between the very NATURE of the way tv shows were written at the time. Plus the way fandom was shaped by a dynamic that has rippled through how media works and is interpreted by fans for decades upon decades. It’s not hard to imagine getting really emotionally invested in the possibility of the protagonists being in love is a fantastic way to enjoy the media!

In conclusion, it’s really fun and easy to go “these bitches gay! Good for them good for them!”

[theresattrpgforthat]

Do you have any solo ttrpgs that deal with like being a bodyguard or someone's knight? It's something I've had rattling around in my head for a while

Theme: Solo Knights

Hello friend, no luck in the bodyguard department but I sure do have some knight games! Let’s take a look.

Frog Errant, by ManaDawn Tabletop Games.

It’s a deadly and brutal world out there, and it is not too friendly for a lone frog. But if you embrace your quest and heed the omens, you may just be able to make a name for yourself. And if you wander long and far enough, you may be remembered in the songs of both frogs and mice.

Frog Errant is a solo, or GMless, game mode for Mausritter or other Into the Odd based games. In Frog Errant you will take up the role of a wandering frog knight-errant, seeking adventure, looking to fulfill a Quest - all while avoiding you prophesied Doom.

If you are familiar with Mausritter, then this game will be pretty easy to pick up. The game builds in some story that isn’t present in Mausritter - primarily the Quest that has been given to your frog knight, as well as a Doom that has been prophesied to overcome you. It looks like you can use a lot of the items and monsters from Mausritter, but Frog Errant has plenty of new pieces too!

Misericorde, by Andrew White.

Misericorde is a game of knightly romance, pining, unrequited love and confronting the expected behaviours of your social class. You play as a squire serving under a knight on a great quest, without your assistance they surely will fail and yet, as a squire you are obligated to remain in the background, forgotten and not commented on. However, you have developed feelings, perhaps unrequited, for your knight. The actions of the game focus on this struggle, between your Duty and your Desire. Will you hold back, hew to your duty and rank; or will you break free and open your heart, no matter how your beloved may respond.

You’re not exactly a knight in this game, but rather a squire to one. Misericorde is completely unlike the other games on this list because it focuses on devotion and desire, rather than the actions that a forsworn duty drives a Knight to do. You play the game by setting up scenes, asking questions, and rolling dice on an Oracle to figure out what happens next. This is an interpretive game, so while the Oracle will point you in a direction, you determine what exactly each result means.

Chalice, by Monkey’s Paw Games.

Chalice is a solo journaling role-playing game where you chronicle the perilous journey of a Grail-seeking knight in Arthurian England. During the game, you will tell the story of your Knight’s physical and spiritual descent as they quest for, and ultimately fail to find, the Grail. Your Knight’s quest is doomed. Their chivalric virtues will be surely undone by their fatal flaws and moral shortcomings.

This looks like the most immersive game for Arthurian mythology as a solo game. The game itself is designed to look like a manuscript from medieval times, calligraphy and all. Your Knight has benefits called Passions, key relationships called Bindings, and a fate determined by drawing cards from a tarot deck. Throughout the game, you will draw more cards that serve as prompts, which will give or strike through your Passions and Bindings, and play happens over the span of years. Each year is measured in two parts: the deed, which will be what your character accomplishes, and the Chanson, which is evocative recording of your character’s deeds. When you are unable to fulfill a prompt given to you, your story end

Pilgrimage of the Sun Guard, by Amanda P.

Quests in King Arthur stories are about ideals, conflict and temptation. 

Pilgrimage of the Sun Guard is a solo prompt-based journaling game where you create a Sun Guard and travel alone on a quest, attempting to hold to your Code until you reach the end, facing trials and complications along the way.  

You are the last Sun Guard. Will you take up the mantle and ride the ancient roads?

Pilgrimage of the Sun Guard follows a cycle of play. You will start by travelling to a new location, and follow the directions according to each location’s prompt. This may involve using or acquiring resources, accomplishing great deeds, and writing a record of what happened with each step of the quest. When you run out of all of your resources, you can choose to either end your quest there, or break your Code to continue. If you like the story of Gawain & the Green Knight, this game might be for you.

Sanctum Guard, by Bulger007.

Sanctum Guard is a 20-minute pen-and-paper solo game about protecting a powerful magic artifact against a horde of night terrors. In this game, you are a lone guardian of a secluded sanctum built to protect the Obsidram, a powerful artifact that can potentially destroy worlds if it falls into the wrong hands.

You live in peace and harmony with the Obsidram while it is hidden in this secret and desolate domain from power-hungry minds. But one night, someone or something finds the way and you see a glimmering portal from which a horde of monsters descends upon you. Will you manage to protect the Obsidram?

This game runs like a tower defense game, and requires a sheet of graph paper to play. You will build your Sanctum randomly, then roll against generated monsters with the hopes that you can take them out before they utterly destroy the Sanctum and take your sacred relic.

This game doesn’t detail who you’re guarding the Obsidram for, although I think you could also substitute the relic for a person, if you want to be guarding someone instead of something.

Falling Kingdom: The Last Knights, by Purple Robed Wizard.

“The lands are shattered, the gods that once held our hand are dead and the beasts are upon us. Our King. killed by his own flesh. All of us, but waiting to follow. But we still stand, we hold our ground as we rot, we are the Last Knights, and we will stand until we last draw breath.”

In Falling Kingdom you control the last Knights of a realm threatened by a great, corrupting and unstoppable force. There is no great victory waiting for you at the end, no songs to be heard. There is only struggle, corruption, betrayal and death.  The Kingdom will Fall, but this story isn’t about that, it is about the heroes that face this imminent fall, the Knights of the realm, normal men and women elevated to a position where they will fight for their homelands against all odds.

This is a map-conquering game, with randomly generated missions, a Great Battle that could turn the tides of the war, and a stages of battles depending on how much territory you win or lose. You can accumulate corruption as you play, which is helpful in getting successful rolls, but accrue too much, and your knights begin to die. If you like a game about strategy, tragedy, and abstract warfare, this might be the game for you.

Sentinel, by Meghan Cross.

You are the lone guardian of a place of great power - known to you only as The Sanctuary. Many years you have kept vigil in this place, guarding what is kept within from any and all who come to disrupt it or steal it for themselves. 

Sentinel is a solo journaling game about a solitary guardian and the place they are charged with keeping safe. It is a deck and dice based game in which you will create your guardian and the sanctuary that they protect before reliving the memories, facing threats, and finding interesting objects while time passes around you. And then, when the time has come for your watch to end, find out what happens to The Sanctuary when you are no longer able to guard it.

This is a journaling game that uses cards to determine what kinds of actions your character can take. Hearts summon memories, Diamonds grant you items, Spades bring threats, and Clubs pass time. If you draw a Joker, the game is over and the story ends. At the end of the game, the final roll determines whether or not you are successful in your quest. This is a great game for folks who like journaling and world building.

Games I've Recommended in the Past

5-Min Knight, by enui.

Fetch My Blade, by Ethan Yen.

[pillowprincessgames]

Dev Log! 1.04 BETA Release Date Confirmed & Info Dump!

I was going to post up a video update, but editing videos is time consuming!!  ​So, written devlog it is! This devlog is a long time coming. There's been some trials and  tribulations leading up to this point. There was a situation of lost coding, lack of time, and even some health issues that kept it from coming out sooner! I was hoping to have it out in March around my birthday. That didn't work out. So it's late! However, no lie, this feels like the biggest update I've ever done for Camp Gash! So, sit tight and get a snack. This may take a minute to read! I feel guilty for not saying much until now.

​ However, I'm here to rectify that! Release date for this update will be placed at the  very end of this devlog! So, here's what is all coming to the:

1.04 BETA Consequences and Scenarios Update

First off: An Inventory System!

That's right! A working, real, inventory! WOOO! I thought it was just going to be a list for now, but I figured out a system! There will be 4 categories of  items:

Consumable Items

Dialog Items

Mission Items

& Special Items

Consumable Items can be clicked on and used in the inventory. Instantly. Consumable items can help with raising and lowering your horny meter, some can be shared to NPCs, and even help your HP. <More on that detail later!

​cigarettes

bottled water

beer

first aid kit

bandages

no-baby pill

​Dialog Items can only be used during interactions with NPC's or during certain situations. A dialog option will either appear or the MC with automatically use them. Each one has a limit to how much you can carry and use. Some dialog interactions won't be present without them!

lube

condoms

Mission and Special Items are items you pick up during missions as an objective. 

Special items are  found in secret, given, or found in select areas. These are considered non interactable.

You start WITH ONE STARTER ITEM that you can pick while in the car ride with Moxie. You can now find items in a stick pile during the tour. It's random chance.

New Artwork!

Another part of this major update is a few new changes to the games artwork! The bridge to the player's  cabin is updated! It is no longer a sketch! The player is getting a new design for their cabin. ...Isn't it delightful?(it's trash I know!) A few new NPC sketch buttons for Carrie, Lyle, Mars, Lucian, and Lucy! I hope to have some new buttons that are finished like Moxie's soon. But, it takes a while to do! I've also resized Moxie's tour buttons so she's not a giantess. She's closer to what she needs to look like compared to the other buttons! The original buttons I created by drawing with a mouse. That's why they looked so wonky! They now have a revamp!

There's a few new MC customization options for their face!

New hair! Long flowy and Mullet(because it's the ✨​80s~!✨​)​, tired eyes, and a new nose!

Added or Expanded Locations!

The nurses station, although mostly still basically a sketch, has a back room that you can go into. A side garden at the green house and a secret 'relief' spot for the green house! Now you can jack it in peace during your groundskeeper tour!

Let's get down to the nitty gritty!!

Game Play Additions and Changes!

There are new things to customize your character and change up player experience! Many of them aren't fully implemented, but will be added in with each bug fix update and future updates. These all include:

The requested virginity option. You can now start off, by choice, as a vcard holder. This means that you can lose that vcard to other NPC's, both counselors and monsters alike. This may change up scenes for sexy time. If you tell your RO that you are a vcard holder or not! Only a few Counselors have been added to this, the monsters for the most part have this implemented! Lyle, Barb, Mars, and Kyle have reactions to this(only certain scenes!). Moxie just knows you are since the two of you are besties. The twins and Carrie,  are unfinished for now. 

The ability to choose if you have pubic hair, facial hair, and body hair. Will be implemented for scenes overtime. (facial hair not a selection for visual MC appearance yet! Still working on it!)

*Some requested that it should be an option for vagina havers (both intersex and lone vagina warriors included) to have an option to have their period during the camp week. (OPTIONAL) Not mentioned or implemented currently, but may open up more options for bloodplay. If this is selected, the game play may increase in difficulty. Monsters, not just the monstrous ROs, smell BLOOD. Attacks may increase and if hiding, yes that will be added later!,  it'll be harder to stay hidden. Survival is about to become more of a thing!

PREGNANCY. Yes, I said it. Pregnancy. Depending on the equipment your MC has - vagina, penis, or both. You are now able to become or make other NPCs pregnant. Will you know? Probably not. Only one NPC can tell you if you are. And it will only be said in passing! Practice safe sex~! Or don't. This doesn't change gameplay much, but will affect your ending. Make your game as MESSY as you want! There are items to prevent - or terminate - the pregnant variable. Condoms and the No baby pill(For MC only). If an NPC knocks you up or you knock another one up, you will gain a variable that will keep track of which one you got pregnant /got pregnant. Once the player is pregnant, unless terminated, you can not become pregnant by another. **Birth preventative items can be purchased in next update when the SHOP is implemented!

The ability to change what type of undies you wear! Briefs, Panties, and Boxers.

You can now be injured during the tour! It's random chance! 

Consequences on day 2 for fucking Barb on night one and NOT having a truce with her.

Lucian has a more complete Sleepover scene if you invite him over! This one has a story attached... I lost all of it for some reason. The coding just disappeared for some reason and I had to rewrite ALL of it. EVERY. SINGLE. THING. And I'm STILL writing it!! 😡 FUUUUUCK! You can be kinky with him or just do it vanilla! (interesting scene if you tell him of your virginity during sex~!🩸​​)

Lyle shower sex on night one (if invited to shower with him after shed sex)​

You can die during rough sex now! Yep. Keep an eye on your HP!  If your health is low during rough scenes you might die! There's consequences to your hoeing now! XD And you don't heal completely when you go to bed. You heal one notch when you sleep now. No more.  DON'T WORRY! I've placed a few first aid kits on the map on day two, if injured when you talk to Lucy on day two you she may heal you once,  and one of your starter items can be a first aid kit! Be safe! LUBE is recommended for rough sex and helps prevent injury. This can be useful for if you have a vagina and are going to have your first time roughly! Just a tip! ;)

There are new dialog options, scenarios, and sexy scenes! You can now KISS the monster at your cabin on night one! Nothing like rewarding your stalker with kiss. 💋

PROTECTIVE MONSTER is now a thing. On night one when you need saving at your cabin -if you know you know- only if your LOVE IS HIGH with the slasher or the swamp monster. (Eldritch horror has it's own idea of protection) They will come to your rescue! This unlocks a different wake up scene for day 2! ...With consequences.

NEW NPC(s)! Jackeline! She's a friend and bandmate of Lyle. This goth gal shall show up on day two after she is mentioned in Lyle and Carrie's day two conversation. She doesn't have much dialog for now but she will have MUCH MORE in the future. She will be... Helpful. Also, a serotonin boosting NPC you can find at the greenhouse on day two! Have fun with the little guy!

​

WOW THAT WAS A LOT! Phew! Do you all see why it took me so long? It has been a TRIAL! Let me tell you! Didn't mean to turn this into a safe sex class but here it is!

I hope to have the newest version of the game posted up here on 

MONDAY April 7th

Of which, if you like what I do so far feel free to become a patron or do a one-time purchase of the game! Every little bit helps.  Thank you all for playing and I do hope you're having fun with what I've created so far! Stay tuned, because there is more to come!

Until Next Time, Doves! Take initiative and game on!

- Pillow Princess Games

Play the current/non updated version HERE! 18+ ONLY!

[pawborough]

July 2024 Check In

Hello, all!

Happy update day! Thank you for your support and patience while we work. This has been one of the busiest times for our team, and we’re making good progress. But it's challenging to share without sounding like a broken record. Lots of coding. Lots of numbers. Lots of items. So little time...!

But first, I must share solemn news. Our backdrop artist, Kzart, has passed away. He died of cardiac arrest just the day after our last update, where we previewed his wonderful work on the Cogwheel Outskirts.

This is a deep and mournful tragedy. Our heart goes out to his family, friends, and loved ones. Kzart was a welcome, cheerful, and bright part of the team, and the loss is devastating. May his memory be a blessing.

We are dedicating our work this month to his memory. We hope to ask your patience while we make decisions for future team members in the wake of his passing.  

To start off, here are some asset updates.

New Icons

We’ve been picking away at icons. Populating the site itself with estimates for cooking, crafting, dailies, site store, and guild play has been a behemoth of a task which has taken weeks of calculating out delicate numbers, drop rates, and seeding tactics. We have an insane amount of spreadsheets. I’m very proud of how much we’ve figured out.

Wild Boar, Bison Calf, Kid, Lamb, Blackbird, Red Squirrel and Brown Hare illustrated by Tybaxel and Remmie

The young animals will be available as plain food in Alpha and part of Beta, but are designed in preparation for our Farming and Husbandry mechanic, explained more in this update!

I’m dying to see the dye icons!

Illustration by Tybaxel

And lastly, we’ve started work on the stone assets!

Harvest Stone, Metropolis Stone, and Luna Stone by Hydde

Above you see the Harvest Stone, Metropolis Stone, and Luna Stone. Paw-carved by catfolk out of various precious stones and the elusive Prismaline—Mewmoia’s magical mineral and the origin of modern magical technology—these stones act as a magical catalyst for sorcerers performing transmutation.  

We also want to note: we see the discrepancy in the Harvest logo and its child assets. While we were working on the visual development, we found that the leaf was not only more recognizable as a symbol, but more reliably adaptable in different simplistic forms. We will be experimenting with replacing the vegetable in the Harvest logo with a leaf.

Recolorings

Recolors continue! This month, we have the Guard set.

Colors done by Emma

New Decor 

We have begun our work on decor!

Our goal is to have a substantial amount of decor befitting every type of backdrop we are starting with. Our first set we are tackling is the Summer Natural set. We have sets known as Sea Faring, City Clearing, Academic, and Winter Natural planned as a starting roster.

Florals by Giulia, lemonade by Jerso, butterlfies by Asp

And here it is put together!

NPC Sketches

Early last month, we shared a preview of the initial sketch for Wheatley and Crowley, the sitewide general store!

Initial feedback included a poor merge of cat-like anatomy and anthropomorphized character acting. We took this feedback, spent another day on visual development for NPCs, and updated our character design visual philosophy!

So, presenting…

And here is how they look on the website!

This sketch is still subject to change as we hash it out, line, and render it, but we’re excited to share what we’ve developed so far!

Wheatley and Crowley were the first NPCs ever developed during pre-production. 

(Just as the Bovine was the first Mystic breed ever developed, and Sugar was the first color palette ever designed!) 

So there is something a tad emotional about making it this far. Seeing them animated and on an actual game UI has been very rejuvenating. We’re nearing the end of this development hole!

So you want to form a team and join the Guild, huh? Meet Maven, your guildmaster. She’s rough, prickly, and can scare the faint of heart. Yet the Guild is dedicated to helping poor cats in need, in the wake of wastebeasts and outlaws terrorizing outskirt villages. You wonder who she is under that thorny exterior…

Maven is a primary character in the ongoing site plot. We have the technology for NPCs to emote during dialogue. Many story-focused NPCs will get this treatment. This means that Maven's expressions will change as you talk to her!

All NPC sketches by Hydde

Everyone knows Winnipeg, the longhair chef from Luna. Introducing his twin sister, Winnifred! Winnifred sells husbandry and farming supplies, including young animals and seeds.

(Note: all 3D assets used for render references are ours, minus the watering can! Credit to Toonz Media Group from Sketchfab.) 

So let’s talk about the farm mechanic!

In Development - Farming and Husbandry

See the initial UIs for our major in-development mechanic.

Plant seeds on plots of land in your camp. Certain plants will raise or lower your soil quality, which in turn will affect how many items these plants yield. It’s up to you as the player to grow a variety of different plants to diversify your soil and get the most yield.

Husbandry will feature the same concept, utilizing livestock as opposed to plants. Grow different animals over time and maintain grass density to get the best quantity of items!

Lastly, some folks were curious about incense, how it works, and its attainment method.

Incense will be craftable, and its ingredients will be farmed! Incense ingredient seeds will be scattered around the game, including as reward drops for gameplay. It will take intentional cultivation to attain an incense item.

Because we had a few users who were curious to the specific ingredients of every incense scent, here is each Borough:

Luna = Lavender and Jasmine Sol = Cinnamon and Fennel Abyssal = Lotus and Sakura  Zenith = Rosemary and Sage Harvest = Basil and Oregano  Cogwheel = Saffron and Turmeric  Metropolis = Patchouli and Vetiver

For testing until farming is implemented, items which would be farmed will be available to buy through Winnifred. 

Cooking and Crafting

Lastly, a peak at the UI for the cook and craft mechanic!

We surveyed the playability of the original grid system and weighed the pros and cons of managing a grid and memorizing recipes in a multiplayer resource game, and ultimately decided that our platform and format doesn’t quite suit the crafting grid playstyle.

Instead, recipes and blueprints are found, added to your collection, and able to be insta-made.

We found the act of users individually adding items from storage to be tedious, and ultimately our original format would end up with users researching recipes on wiki articles instead of engaging in explorative play. While other games have crafting loops which incentivize exploration, the petsite setup as we have built it simply does not accommodate it without serious overhaul. 

But we hoped to preserve some of that magic by including the “add ingredient” feature. Users will be able to discover new combinations by experimenting with add-ons. For example, a pizza recipe could become mushroom pizza by adding mushrooms!

Users may still end up just looking things up, but the mechanic itself is now not ultimately dependent on off-site research.

Peak at this mockup recipe!

We are currently experimenting with how to include the NPCs in this UI format. Fear not that you do not see Winnipeg here. He will be in the game!

This mechanic in general is what we are currently working on! Thanks for sticking by!

And that’s all we have for today. We know that a lot of users are holding out for Mystic breed updates in the demo, and we are working on those. But game playability is taking the highest place for us, as we want to get testing ASAP! So, we appreciate this patience. Moontails, and likely Thumpers, will be here for Beta, but our #1 focus this last month has been the sprint to the finish line for playability in both development and assets. The semi-quiet activity is because we're putting all our energy into this huge milestone. 

Which to mention!

Alpha acceptances have been sent out! If you have not yet, check your email!

We asked those who receive it to reply that they have. There is not a strict deadline on this reply, we simply want to ensure that those who received the email have seen it and are ready to volunteer. We will still be sending keys to everyone who received an email, minus those who are dropping out. If someone is MIA by the time people are registering accounts, we will consider reaching out to other potential testers.

Home stretch, everyone! It’s starting to come together just how much we’ve completed, and the application is beginning to feel real in a way it hasn’t previously. We’re all super antsy to buff it out and get people playing!

Thank you all!

To summarize: We shared icons, Guard set recoloring, decor assets, 3 new NPC sketches, the farm and husbandry mechanic, and the cook/craft functionality.

What to expect next month: Further asset and development updates. Check-ins for how Alpha will be going, timeline expectations in the wake, NPCs and lore. 

[qwertyprophecy]

The Illusion of Aggravating Player-ness

Pictured above: demo footage of me attempting to hit the Hero when their dodging program is turned to maximum. (I can only test this for so long before getting annoyed, which is exactly the vibe I'm going for.)

More about the feeling that has inspired The Dark Queen of Mortholme under the cut:

A couple years back I happened upon a tumblr post identifying a surprisingly common sentiment when playing Pokémon. The player has an edge over NPCs in battles for basically the entire game, because unlike those silly programmed losers we've figured out how to use healing potions. So upon getting to end game and witnessing our first case of the NPC trainer healing their Pokémon to full with a hyper potion, it feels like such bullshit. How come they get to do that? Only I get to do that!

There are instances of little details in many other games that evoke a similar emotion, like this one boss in Sekiro who can sneakily counter the player's charged attack with a move that till then only the player has been using. (Please let me know if you personally recall any examples!) The sheer audacity of non-player characters using player-only moves, being annoying as I am! It's a deliciously strong reaction that goes beyond the game's difficulty ramping up; I think it's about recognising ourselves, the essence of distinctly player-like behaviour in this fictional entity made from code.

While thinking about that I also happened to be mulling over what I considered a huge missed opportunity in the end boss of the game Katana Zero. Without spoilers, let's just say that it made me consider whether it would be even remotely doable to create a narrative boss fight against a player-like entity who appears to get to save and re-try the fight by themselves. In Undertale there's a brief illusion of a NPC saving and loading game states, but they don't quite do it like a player would.

The illusion would have to include a feeling that your opponent not only gets to try again but is learning from their mistakes. Furthermore it's specifically an advantage they have over you; you don't get to try again, nor do you get room to improve. And unlike them, your preprogrammed skillset is designed to have exploitable weaknesses and a static power level which can be surpassed.

No matter how skilled, you'd be doomed to lose against an opponent like that. The bosses we beat have it rough, huh. I myself am not particularly good at video games–when I try to get past a difficult boss fight in any game where those are designed to take a fair amount of attempts and learning, I feel in my bones that meta-level story of striving to overcome a seemingly impossible obstacle. It's a journey through various emotions from eagerness to frustration, culminating in the triumphant success.

But from the boss's point of view, that story takes a very different shape, involves different emotions, and (assuming the player keeps playing) invariably culminates in a predestined loss. Sounds unfun. So obviously, that's the experience I aim to provide! (Unfun games really are my forte, with my previous work simulating jubilant experiences such as job hunting blues! anxiety! exam anxiety! trying to fix a spaceship engine that's killing you!)

Who wouldn't want to enjoy being the most powerful being in their universe until some little dipshit bursts in and locks you in an unending battle till they’re satisfied and you’re dead?

[rindragon-from-twewy]

Swap au character intros part 4!!!

Spoilers for specifically Raincode Chapter 0 ahead!

Let's start with Zilch! In this au his forte becomes Audial Aptitude - thanks in part to his animal ears. If you've seen my art of Zilch before, you'll probably have noticed I like drawing him with his animal ears as his actual ears and not on top of his hat. It's cuz I generally just hate the ambiguity of it. Are the animal ears real? Are they just on his hat? Why do they move? Why does he have 4 ears? So I just like making his animal ears his only set of ears. That being said, apparently they're fox ears??? I always assumed wolf??? But I digress- His uniform has been changed up to be reminiscent of an orchestra conductor cuz hahah audio. His face tattoos are meant to be those spotify code scanners - the right cheek leading to It's All So Incredibly Loud by Glass Animals and We Own The Night by Chandler Kinney on the left (cuz I think it's funny!) As for his last name change, "Allegro" in musical terms means "to be played very quickly" which I thought would suit him quite well as someone who can solve cases really fast. His personality is basically the same, the only alteration being that he carries around a notepad and pen in order to help keep track of all the hundreds of things he's constantly hearing all the time.

Next is Pucci. She's received Spectal Projection from Melami and if you thought being good at hearing made her existential then BOY HOWDY does being able to use her body as a vessel for spirits fuck her up even more! Originally I was going for a classic "fortune teller" look for her but I instead went with a cute seamstress-y sort of look instead cuz I couldn't really get what I had in mind initially to look good. She wears a tape measure like a scarf and a thimble as a necklace charm. Her eyes, while cute, have a sort of dead look in them that make others wonder if she's even alive at all. Her last name has been changed from Lavmin to Lavender because in flower language, they're representive of purity, serenity, grace and calmness - all traits she seems to exhibit until she actually starts talking and you realise she's just sort of awkward and shy. She finds it easier to talk to ghosts/spirits then living creatures and honestly probably gets along reeeaaally well with this AU's version of Vivia.

Now, you may be looking at Aphex and going "Rindude! You changed fuck all about him!" And yeah, you're right... The only major changes I made was switching out his coat, boots and like doubling his muscle mass. He's strong. He could beat you up, no questions asked and it definitely shows! His forte is now Thoughtography but he's just as angry as ever - originating from the "front lines" that canon Zange mentioned in his own backstory. For that reason, his coat is inspired by WW2 trenchcoats and while my art doesn't show it very well, everything he's wearing looks and smells like he's crawled straight out of a dumpster. Originally I was going to change his last name to Harkness as an homage to Captain Jack Harkness, a WW2 soldier inspired character from (surprise, surprise) Doctor Who but considering the fact I did that exact same thing with an oc of mine for my A levels earlier this year... I instead went with Tyler; an homage to another Doctor Who character called Rose Tyler who is also a badass blonde <3

And that's all the details I'm sharing for now! It's a little strange considering I've written the Storm Cypher fanfic about half way through its chapter 0 already so I have a lot more to say about the train gang then I did anyone else - since they've already had stuff actually written for them. Melami and Zange's swap au designs will drop like... as soon as I figure out how to draw elderly people. So soon, hopefully! But yeah, I'm cooking super good atm I just can't really share much due to the nature of writing lol. I've been loving getting asks about it though! Deadass, it makes me kick my legs and giggle to know people are crazy enough to care about this AU- >w<

[cherrytastiq]

Time Squad Character Analysis #2: Lawrence "Larry" 3000

Hi again! I'm finally continuing this series of analyzing the TS main trio. This time it's the Larry 3000, Cartoon Network's sassiest robot and the only character that's made me believe the network execs didn't bother watching Time Squad after the first episode. More on that later.

Backstory

Much like Tuddrussel, Larry's full backstory isn't really discussed in the show and is only referred to in throwaway lines, though we can get a rough sense of his life before the show.

The only mention of Larry's early life and childhood is in Monty Zuma, where he explains the first 9 years of his life were spent in a pitch black warehouse. No other information is known about Larry, like his model manufacturers or if he was even built on Earth.

Larry mentions his past diplomatic affairs multiple times in the show, like escorting Queen Jezebel III to a costume Halloween gala or being an assistant to presidents, a part of his past that he's very proud of. From the way he recalls the memories it's almost like part of him wants to go back to the "good old days" back when he was surrounded by etiquette and class, instead of being stuck as a janitor slash cook, basically working for a manchild. Look no further than in Tea Time, where he calls the fancy tea party "a refreshing change of pace".

One specific figure resurfaces multiple times in Larry's memories, that person being a Senator Fiskmeyer, whom we never get to actually see in the show.

He and Larry were presumably very close, to the point Larry felt comfortable enough to play pranks on him, and Fiskmeyer gifting the robot a golden set of golf clubs for helping out with negotiations.

It's basically impossible to pinpoint Larry's exact age, but there's a few hints that suggest he is a very old model, since his job as a diplomatic assistant / ambassador could only exist prior to Earth's political unification which made his services obsolete (see Larry Antique Theory).

Before Otto joined Time Squad, Larry describes his experience working solely with Tuddrussel as a "nightmare", since he's not programmed in the subject of history and Buck is the less than ideal time cop. It's always struck me as odd that Larry wasn't taught anything about history considering he's meant to be a diplomatic assistant. I figured knowing about world history could help a lot in negotiations between countries so you can at least know the context behind wars and sociopolitical states, but I guess whoever designed Larry thought it wasn't a big deal. Speaking of his coding, he's known to be programmed in a couple things, including etiquette, culture, all known languages, and apparel composition and design. Why they made him knowledgeable in fashion but not history is beyond me.

Freud's psychoanalysis

Freud describes Larry as suffering from "acute self doubt, which makes him passive aggressive, manipulative in nature[.]", all traits that Larry actually displays in the show. Another analysis has already touched on this, but Otto and Larry are both verbal manipulators, with the robot (kind of ironically) relying on emotions to get his way. As for him being passive aggressive, just watch any episode where he complains about something.

Larry and Otto

I've talked about this before but Otto and Larry is my favorite character dynamic in the entire series due to how much it grows throughout the show. In the first couple episodes, Larry sees Otto as little more of a nuisance, some kid from the 21st century they shouldn't have picked up, just another mouth to feed and another mess to clean up after. He finds his general presence and curiosity annoying and dismisses him, especially while he's working.

Although, even in these early episodes Larry isn't completely irritable. He shows Otto the Milky Way galaxy in Blackbeard and they go shopping together in ancient China in Confucius, both activities sans Tuddrussel. I wonder if Larry's more affable when he's not around the big oaf?

It's only a few episodes later when something really shifts. Maybe Larry realized how polite Otto is, or maybe he saw how many missions they've succesfully completed ever since the kid's been part of the team, but by Tea Time he's happily making scrambled eggs for Otto (this cements him as the cook of the trio, something that we'll go further in depth later).

From here on out the two only get closer and closer, to the point of replicating a parent-son relationship. It's damn cute. Larry takes care of Otto when he's sick in Floundering Fathers, they go shopping in Ancient China again in Kubla Khan't, and he joins forces with Tuddrussel to get some gifts for the little guy's birthday.

Also, this exchange from Kubla Khan't. I love this show.

Somewhere along the road both Larry and Buck recognize Otto as a kid they have to take care of rather than a coworker. Larry is no patron saint, though. He ignores Otto in Father Figure, abandons him in Hate and Let Hate, and his retelling of the mission in Thrilla' reveals he finds his infodumping annoying.

Other things to note: In Ivan the Untrainable, Larry mentions he had to 'fail Otto in nuclear physics', implying he home-schools him, and even goes as far as to teach him subjects fit for his intelligence rather than the standard 3rd grade academic curriculum. Otto also loves mirroring Larry's movements and general mannerisms from time to time, and is eager to learn about Larry's interests, like learning how to sew or curtseying.

THE MACARONI ARTTTTT

I could go on about Larry and Otto forever, so let's move on to the next relationship dynamic.

Larry and Food

Yet again, another wonderful analysis already discussed this at full length, but I feel that it's important I mention it here. I heavily recommend you check it out! Seriously, read Larry and Food: A Love Story.

One of Larry's main interests that becomes an integral part of his personality is his love of food and cooking. Despite this, he has no functioning mouth and no real way to enjoy food. He's programmed to be deeply involved with human culture yet he can't fully experience it due to his physical limitations. Therefore, the dissection argues, Larry's cooking is his way of communicating his own needs and emotions onto others and to manipulate how others feel.

Larry and Buck

Where do I even begin with these two. Okay.

Larry and Tuddrussel's relationship flip flops between work buddies and married couple, that is, one that's about to file for divorce. Larry detests Buck. He hates how filthy and unkempt he is, his immaturity, his bad manners, how brutish he is and how he never appreciates Larry's efforts to keep the Satellite running. He loves insulting him through passive aggressive remarks and, unlike Tuddrussel, Larry rarely shows fear towards him, aside from the times he gets physically hurt (or threatened to be hurt) by the big oaf.

Yet, despite this, despite all the hatred he holds for him... Larry finds himself desperately in need of him. Though he'll never properly admit it, Buck's presence in the Satellite gives Larry something to do, a change in routine from the computers and mission logs.

Larry is stuck in a constant battle with himself, sometimes wanting to apply for a transfer so he never sees Buck again, and other times getting so jealous he concocts an evil plan to sabotage a meal between the man and his ex-wife just because they were getting along again.

Speaking of Ex, it's a fan favorite for a reason. It's so late into the show that Mark Hamill's influence on the character had transfomed him from an annoyed ex-diplomat to an effeminate housewife suffering from one-sided love/hatred. How these lines got past the network censors still baffles me along with everyone else in the fandom.

God that turkey is still disgusting no matter how many times I watch this scene why did he do that

His jealousy gets cranked up to 100 in Ex, proclaiming Tuddrussel as "his" and accuses Sheila of trying to "take him away". Even at the end of the episode when the misunderstanding is clear, he is still mad at Tuddrussel despite him doing nothing particularly wrong, and tells him he's "sleeping on the sofa" that night.

More things to note... Remember how Tuddrussel has Texan heritage and likes to act and sometimes dress like a cowboy? Larry has a semi-confirmed cowboy fetish. He's presumably the one who dressed Cleopatra like a cowgirl in Shop like an Egyptian, one of his clones flirts with Tuddrussel in what is basically a gay robot nightclub in Day of the Larrys and he finds being a cowboy fun in Billy the Baby. Either Tuddrussel awakened something within him, or the big guy simply reinforced what was already there.

Sidenote, in Billy the Baby Larry takes the role of the comic relief, becoming uncharacteristically stupid. Something about that cowboy outfit turns him into a bimbo.

The show loves treating the two like a married couple, from Buck referring to Larry as "the old ball and chain" in Larry Upgrade to Freud becoming their couples counselor in Horse of Horrors. While Buck has hearts around him when seeing Cleopatra, Larry has hearts around him when seeing Buck in Thrilla', albeit this only being Buck's vision.

Other relationships

The only notable relationships Larry has with secondary characters are XJ5 and Lance 9 Trillion, the two other robots shown in Time Squad. Lance is Larry's celebrity crush; he asks for his autograph and generally looks up to him. That's about all there is to say about the two.

As for XJ5 and Larry, I've always struggled to define what their relationship is like. They act like petty rivals, and XJ5 loves critiquing Larry's lack of technological gadgets and antiquity. Even still, they find middle ground in Ex since neither of them want to see Sheila and Tuddrussel back together (possibly for different reasons).

Yes Larry is gay and camp

The more you rewatch Time Squad, the more you realize just how much the writers (and Hamill) flanderized Larry as it went on.

Series co-writer Carlos Ramos describes Larry as "nothing but fetishes", and he's absolutely right! Larry might be a robot programmed in etiquette, but deep within him lie some more... risqué interests.

He loves dressing up in feminine clothes and doing effeminate activities like foo-foo cooking, putting on makeup (something Buck recalls in Monty Zuma), manicures, books meant for young adult women featuring glamorous women and provocative romances (Danielle Steel and Jackie Collins are his favorite authors) and sewing. He's apparently been called a sissy "his whole life" so take that as you will.

Larry's buttons

Okay this is a bit of a jokey section but hear me out. Larry's chest panel and buttons are sort of like his... cleavage? Nipples? He's embarrassed when Otto opens up his chest in Daddio DaVinci (how did he know he could do that?) and exclaims "Excuse me!" when the kid tries picking up a radio signal.

Genuinely what is his problem

Final Thoughts

Did you know Larry calls Buck quequi in the Mexican dub, a nickname so convoluted I made a chart for it?

Larry sends me into a blind rage. I can't write any more about this robot it's killing me. Bad Girls by Donna Summers is ruined. Because of woke.

[saturnine-saturneight]

Holoatypical: Dev Log 1

Number one in what's hopefully going to be a pretty long series of updates!

So, first things first: Godot rocks. I've been using it for two weeks now, having switched from GameMaker (and before that, Twine, and before that, Java and JavaScript), and Godot does so much of the heavy lifting for you. It genuinely feels like an engine that's designed for making games. Unlike GameMaker, which was like wading through molasses every step of the way, while some sort of molasses shark is biting at your ankles. And I've coded in JavaScript.

Second, let me show you what I've been up to!

As you can see, I'm working on a prototype to try out the merging mechanic. It's got some (ha) bugs, and dragging things could be smoother, but the critters do actually snap into the grid and merge now, and I'm very pleased with that.

This chamber you see here is going to be the lab. As it's planned right now, the player will have infinite initial building blocks (eggs, spores, seeds...), which merge into different critters depending on environmental variables (artificially set in the lab) and on which other specimens are currently in the chamber. The challenge is to figure out the right parameters. I have no idea how big the chamber needs to be for that, but that's not really an issue, because...

This isn't so much a prototype as I'm just straight up building the foundations for a game, which is why it's taking me so long. The grid you see here is controlled with a few variables, and everything is flexible enough that I can simply change the grid size during playtesting and it still works.

The tile grid is an array of arrays, filled with slot nodes that I instantiate at runtime. Is this the best way to learn a new program and language? Haha. Who knows.

Specimens have a sprite sheet with all their stages on it, and when a critter levels up, the part that's visible to the player just needs to be shifted 64 pixels to the right.

That's x starting point, which is the specimen stage/level times 64, then y starting point, width, and height. Fun! So easy!!

As to the sprite sheet, I'm going against common advice and making these big. The 1bit style is super fast to do, and in my opinion, a certain level of detail is important to make the sprites look like anything. I'm moreso playing with the look than really wanting to make a retro game.

This sheet only took me an evening! I'm enjoying it because it really forces you to abstract the shape and focus on what's most important about the critter. (This is a style test - I haven't decided yet how weird I want to go with these vs making them look more natural.)

Next up will be ironing out the kinks, making an egg dispenser and a specimen incinerator so the field can be filled up and emptied, coming up with a few more specimen, and then going into play testing.

But in the next dev log, you're probably going to hear way more about the story and the characters. I am eyeing a visual novel extension for Godot (dialogic), which, if it does what I think it does, is going to take a lot of work off my hands and only leaves me with writing the actual dialogue, which I've already started on.

@tragedycoded @badscientist @curiouscalembour @writingrosesonneptune @gioiaalbanoart @monstrify @cowboybrunch @tsunamiscale @marlowethelibrarian

Was this format interesting? Less code? More code? Anything you specifically want me to talk about in this process? Let me know!

[molsno]

whats the most obscure game youve ever played and what did you think of it

it was a zero escape wannabe called birth ME code, and it was so infuriatingly bad it was one of the only games I've ever left a review of on steam. I'll copy that here, but I'll preface it by saying that I talk about the game's very blatant transmisogny and poor handling of sexual assault

I really wanted to like Birth ME Code after how much I enjoyed its prequel, Head AS Code. But I can literally never recommend this game or any of the other games in this series to anyone because of the violently transphobic trope which is an unskippable part of the story. Spoilers below:

The character Luxuria, the embodiment of the deadly sin Lust, is presumed to be a girl at first. However, later in the story, Lux is revealed to actually be a boy, and then proceeds to attempt to sexually assault the protagonist with a POV CG. The developer doesn't seem to understand that, even though this character is not transgender, he still embodies a transphobic stereotype. Trans women are often presumed to be men tricking people into believing that they're women with the intention of sexually assaulting them, and this utterly false stereotype is not only the root cause of a lot of discriminatory legislation, but quite literally gets trans women killed. I find it really hard to believe that the developer didn't think about how Luxuria might be interpreted, given the current political climate surrounding trans people.

Besides that, I have a lot of other gripes with this game. I was really intrigued by the premise, in which you play as the mastermind of the game - a female character, no less. However, Ancora is extremely bland. She feels oddly uninterested and clueless about the game that she's supposedly masterminding. She has the highest stakes here! Why doesn't she seem to care that much? I found Simon from HAC to be a somewhat enjoyable protagonist, so why did I find Ancora uninteresting? Honestly, I believe it's because Miracle Moon is somewhat inept at writing women. When Ancora isn't making pointless jokes about how big her boobs are, she has very little personality to speak of.

The writing in this game in general is bad. BMC tries very hard to be Zero Escape, and it fails to come even close to the heights of the ZE franchise while carrying over all of its most frustrating flaws and amplifying them. You'll find plenty of poorly explained pseudoscience topics here, seemingly chosen at random, with no real significance or integration into the larger plot. On top of that, the characters are unlikable. This is somewhat intentional, as they're all designed to embody the Seven Deadly Sins, but just because a character is a bad person doesn't mean they can't be enjoyable. All of the characters are shallow, and even those who deal with topics that are intended to be "deep", such as sexual assault, are handled with a total lack of care and serve no purpose other than to shock the player. This game says nothing meaningful about sexual assault or any other kind of crime, even though it really should, given its plot.

Did I enjoy anything about Birth ME Code? Well, sort of. I enjoyed a few of the puzzles, although most of them left me scratching my head - the solutions often felt arbitrary, and it left me wondering how I was supposed to figure that out. The art was... okay, even if I found the character designs kind of ugly. The best thing I have to say is that BMC has an awesome soundtrack. It's disappointing that the OST isn't for sale.

In conclusion, don't play this game. It's not worth your time. I was extremely disappointed with it, and its flaws are so egregious that I can't recommend any games in this series to anyone. Miracle Moon has potential to improve as a writer and developer, but the Abime series is a hard pass after playing this game.

[tmnt-tychou]

Hello again!!

I have another character for you!! How about Splinter?? 😄

Thanks as always!! 😊

Sorry this took me a while to get to, it's been a busy week. But I am LOVING these and thank you to everyone who submitted asks. This is the most asks I've ever received and I have greatly enjoyed this. A Tier: 90's movie Splinter: This is a rat Splinter. He is a good dad and tries his best. This man loves his sons. Also, easily the most frail of all the Splinters, but still manages to toss Shredder off a building.

2003: Another rat Splinter. This man loves his sons and also loves his father, Hamato Yoshi. He is wise, caring, and very invested in in his sons' lives.

2012: A Hamato Yoshi Splinter. I love this Splinter so much. I think he is my favorite thing to come out of 2012. This man is Dad Vibes so much! He loves his kids and he wants them to have the best lives he can provide. I also love that we got this massive more human-sized Splinter. Just love him all around.

B Tier: 80's cartoon Splinter: A Hamato Yoshi Splinter, he has a great design and amazing voice actor. He is calm, he is zen and fatherly. He looses points because he never calls the turtles his sons. They are always "My turtles/pupils/students." The very first time I heard Splinter call the boys his sons was in the 90's movie and it blew my little mind. (Note, I'm not sure if maybe they changed it in the last seasons where they were trying to be more like the live action movies. It's been so long, I don't remember.)

2007 Splinter: I THINK this is a Hamato Yoshi Splinter? This is a hard one for me because everything in the movie is good. I love his design, I love his VA, I love his lines and how he interacts with the turtles. But there was just something OFF about the whole of the 2007 movie and I figured it out by reading the comics that take place before the movie. In which Splinter picks Leonardo ONLY to go on this world tour for vague reasons while the others are stuck at home. Raphael is immediately hurt and angry at the blatant favoritism. Don and Mikey look like they are so used to it, they don't even argue anymore. Leo is so much the golden child in this movie it hurts me in my soul. Splinter is a terrible father, but he was fine on screen if you take the movie at face value.

C Tier: Next Mutation Splinter: I don't recall if it was ever clear if he was a ran or Hamato Yoshi. He knew Venus' dad, so maybe Hamato Yoshi? He gives off these prancy, gay dad vibes which are kind of fun and fresh for a Splinter. (He plays chess out in the park late at night with his blind boyfriend.) He doesn't do too much to parent his extremely dumbass kids. Maybe since they're 18 he's decided they are their own problem now. And while the turtle suits are pretty nice for a TV production, the rat suit is BAAAAD.

Bayverse Splinter: This one makes no sense. Any Splinter that takes out Hamato Yoshi completely really throws off the universe. Why is he so Asian coded when he has no Asian influence in his life aside from finding a book on martial arts? It's weird. Other than that, he's fine in the movies.

Rise Splinter: A Hamato Yoshi Splinter. I like that we got a Splinter where you can really see the depression from being turned into a rat. And you can see how the turtles turned out to be different people: Leo and Raph especially, without Splinter there to be an influence on the group dynamic. But the characterization doesn't make sense. He says he loves his boys, but he doesn't always know their names? I know this was played for laughs, but the characterization wasn't there. Also minus points for the god-awful character design. Again, I know dad-bod Splinter was played for laughs, but...we had to look at it.

Mutant Mayhem Splinter: Again, another Splinter without Hamato Yoshi that makes no sense. However, he is a GOOD dad who loves his sons and does his best to keep his family together. I love this idea that he is a shut in because he is actually scared of the surface. I do have a hard time buying he is a martial arts master from merely watching kung fu movies. And also minus points for the god-awful character design.